Chibi Cell's aspirations for Universal Domination
by Kinsemini
Summary: FOR ANTI-CELL FANS ONLY: A 3 year old Cell plots revenge and moans + cries a lot. His squeaky voice is driving him insane and all the comfort he gets is from a cat's head... Go figure
1. Default Chapter

The green mucus (all that was left of Cell) slithered across the deserted wasteland, the intensity of the battle with Gohan

The green mucus (all that was left of Cell) slithered across the deserted wasteland, the intensity of the battle with Gohan. Cell was still alive; the microscopic android germ that was his ever mighty ultimate form cursed all Saiyans and their friends. One word: - Revenge, and after he had revenge he would have a nice game of Universe domination. He was trying to get past that he was this biomechanical blip that had no chance whatsoever at this moment in time in getting revenge. So he waited, 5 long years he waited. He was still a piece of Mecha mess but had biologically generated into a young android. He was a kind of cross between Garlic Junior and a horny toad. Chibi Cell looked harmless and even the evil glare made it look like he was about to sneeze. He attempted to speak for the first time and he sounded like Bulma on Crack and Helium. "Dude this is fucked up right here." He said disgusted with his voice. Chibi Cell tried to fly, he began to glow a thin yellow aura that looked like it was going to short circuit, he kind of waddle a few steps and jumped up in the air, hardly leaving the ground he landed on his butt and cross legged he started shouting "What, I can't even fly! Come on! I have been nothing but green faeces for two years and now I can actually speak, I can't get a fucking break! I (lips pout and eyes water) wanna rule the universe and no one is being my friend. All I want is to eat people, rule the universe and poop!" (Sobs so loudly it sends a satellite signal to space. A laser is shot from it heading for Earth.) Meanwhile a girl in pretty pink frilly frocks is grooming her pussy (laser coming faster) Her pussy purrs with delight and plays with her bell and her pink bow, (Laser beam visible) The little girls pussy panics and goes into an epileptic fit while the girls wonders why her pussy is being such a vicious cunt. Laser beam hits little girl's lap where pussy is. Nothing happens. The little girl grooms her pussy once more and suddenly her pussy is charged with energy and begins pooping rapidly on the girl, her pussy farts and explodes. The girl is shocked and realises the laser hit her also. Her legs slide off her body and to the ground where a dog comes along and pisses on them while a rat nibbles at the flesh.   
  
Back to Chibi Cell, a cats head lands in his lap with its face looking like someone has rammed a cob of sweet corn up it's once attached ass. Cell is overjoyed and ties string to is snapped spine, cuddling it and squeezing it so hard the eyes nearly pop out. He begins his journey to Beat the shit out of Goku's crew…….with a cats head.   
  
*Silouhette of a desert sunset with the shadow of Chibi Cell dragging a Cats head behind him and the tinkling of the bell. *


	2. Cell tries to be evil

Chibi Cell continued his journey to eliminate Shitty Saiyans (as you do when you're a pint sized bottle green overlord)

Chibi Cell continued his journey to eliminate Shitty Saiyans (as you do when you're a pint sized bottle green overlord).The tinkle of his "friend's" bell sounded.A once loved kitty, now nothing but a mutated cats head (Laser/Squits-Boom! Thing).He called her Poopsie after 5 long hours of names (Nipple, Frappe, Clitoris, Dungaree's etc.)She was letting off the most disgusting stench in the galaxy.Chibi Cell wandered stopping every five minutes to re-attach Poopsie's eye.Once again he glowed yellow and managed to sustain floating, he flew across the desert and came to a field "Yey! I can fly, take that Gohan you little shi..Woah!"The squeaky pea crashed into a field of Buffalo.Once he pulled his head out of a Buffalo's Muffalo he thought about revenge."Ha!That Gohan will pay, first I will rip out his insides, stuff them back in the wrong way, force him to shit them out and eat them whilst singing Spice Girls!"(Does a Dr. Evil pose.)He grinned evilly patting a Spice Girls CD in his pocket.The Chibi Cell Ghost thing appeared and burped loudly…he then returned sticking his finger up at Chibi Cell.Cell, confused more than ever went to kill the buffalo he had a liaison with and pushed his hands together creating a small ball of light, it then shot a thin beam at the Buffalo's forehead who blinked blankly and then frowned, charging faster at Chibi Cell.Chibi Cell screeched like a girl (did the whole Looney toons thing) and hugged Poopsie with all his might.He was then hit and flew straight across to the Amazon jungle where he fell and cracked his pelvis.Relieving his wedgie (and now with a permanent limp,) Cell starts to well up and screams and kicks the floor shouting, " Why can't I be evil!I want to kill people and everyone is so unfair!I look like a tree, smell as bad as poopsie (Poopsie's blank face) and can't get Cliff Richard out of my head!!!"His tantrum had begun.

Meanwhile a mother ape was giving birth while the father ape was recording it with his video camera (Come on, everyone has them these days.)They celebrate happily and kiss holding the baby close to their arms.A rumble is heard and a stampede comes rushing through taking the father ape with them.He gets rammed up the ass by a Rhino, and trampled on by a giraffe.Left for dead a female elephant sits on him and his arms and legs pop off (lots of squelching and blood.)Using the ape's arm to wipe herself she has an accident and her acidic piss melts the apes head, all that is left is the upper torso.The rat appears and nibbles at the arms and legs leftover.The baby ape cries and the mother punches it."You're fathers dead, and all you can do is be selfish. THWAP!"A flock of vultures carry the torso in the air for lunch and one had to scratch his balls so it fell.

Back to Cell, an apes upper torso landed in front of them.Cell wiped his eyes and squealed with delight and slotted poopsie's spine into the upper torso."You got a chest now Poopsie!!Lets go find Gohan and make his hair obey gravity for once."Poopsie's expression stays.

*Silhouette of Chibi Cell & Poopsie walkibng through the jungle while animals drop dead as an effect of Poopsie's stench (awwwww).*


End file.
